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It's Already Programmed. Stop Trying So Hard.
It's Already Programmed! Stop trying so hard. By Sheree Rainbolt-Kren Just when I thought it was safe to settle things once and for all. I have been working on a special project to produce some Spiritual workshops in my community. I felt the time was right to get up and close with people. I've been on my own dedicated journey for almost 6 years, and feel ready to open up to a new way of Being in the world around me. I have been writing press releases, and planning the classes, and even wrote my first 2 hour, introductory seminar, complete with humorous antidotes. Yes, I have been jazzed and have no doubt that what I am creating will be wonderful. It's in the bag. This attitude and knowing is the result of a lot of inner work and thanks to the beauty and grace of so many fine teachers in my life. Took a long time to get here. I came to a point, a few days ago, where I had pretty much finished all the footwork. Now, I just needed to breathe, sit back and enjoy the process, just like I had been taught. The workshops begin a month from now. Plenty of time to practice, and build. I have a great deal of creative energy these days, and the task before me now is to stay grounded and focused. These were good plans, carefully thought out, and in the arms of Angels. Ahhhh, the future. Then, last night, unexpectedly, my husband arrived home to deliver some very interesting news. One of the Vice Presidents of his company (total bigwig) announced in a committee meeting that my husband would be helping to execute the F & B training for all the new hotel openings, all over the world, to include the training for the six star Hotels in Europe; namely Austria, Ireland and Germany. This was news to my husband. And to me. Actually, truthfully, we could feel something brewing in the air, but we couldn't put our finger on it, and just surrendered it. It felt like positive rumblings. But, we never imagined another hugeness, apart from the one we were already feeling. I guess I should mention that we have coolly mused, more than once, how grand it would be if my husband was promoted to be a GM for one of these six star, $900 a night, hotels. But, well, you know, these are far away places, and we have three kids, and, well, Austria is so heavenly. And, add to that, I turn 50 in a couple of years, and that seems late, kinda. But, oh, the thought of it. We finished our daydreams and did some laundry. Later, I breezed through the wonderful pages of my first seminar, just to get back on track. Before I go on, I have to tell you about the movie, Sound Of Music. When I was 8 or 9 or so, my Mother took me to see The Sound Of Music. I was a tomboy then. The title freaked me out. I thought, "What the?" I begged to pass so I could hang with my next door neighbor, Richard Schneider, and play fort and kick the can in the street. Plus, I was real thirsty and was sure I needed a couple of hours to drink something. She gently drug me out of the house, stuffed me in the station wagon, with my giggling sister, and off we went to see some chic named Julie Andrews sing opera. Somebody kill me. To this day, I can recall the well of emotion that kicked in when the movie opened and Julie was on that hilltop in her basic gray Heidi dress, singing that heavenly song, overlooking the hills and valley's, and castles and lakes and flowers. I can only tell you that at 9 years old, or thereabouts, I knew what it meant to be rock solid stunned. It took my breath away. As I look back on it, I realize it was a darn big emotion for a little pint size tomboy munching popcorn with extra butter. The planetary location known as Austria has been on my mind ever since. From the opening scene, until the very end of the movie, I was in total awe. Every 12 frames, I recall having this thought running through my head: OMG, I wanna live there. OMG, I wanna live there. OMG, I wanna live there. Christopher Plummer would be my faithful husband. He would wait for me and keep his guitar well tuned. Julie would bow out and become my Grandmother. I was so taken by the movie, I saw it several more times before it finally closed. During the next 40 years, this would be my favorite movie of all time. Even after Out Of Africa, The Big Chill, and The Matrix. Whenever I had the chance to say my favorite movie out loud, I did so with wild abandon. Whenever I would see Julie Andrews in a different movie, it hurt me. It wasn't right. I would always erase the newer movies in my mind, and reactivate the Sound Of Music, just so it wouldn't fade away. Although, I loved her in Thoroughly Modern Millie, and that Victor/Victoria movie was a scream, but by that time, at about age 35, Austria felt further away from my life. The journey between the Heidi dress and right now, has been nothing short of amazing. I won't go into the details, but suffice it to say, it looked nothing like Heidi dresses, lakes and castles. More like, I-95 and Cracker Barrel. OK, I don't mean that. "So, isn't this interesting", I thought, as I was sipping coffee in my backyard sanctuary this morning. What am I to make of it? What if? Hmm. Gosh, can I really invest anything in this moment? Is it possible? Could it be? I mean, OMG. The only manifesting I did on the Austria thing was to daydream my whole life about living in Europe, and especially Austria. The beauty was something I craved all throughout my life. I once had the opportunity to travel briefly to Europe when I was training with Villeroy and Boch out of New York City. They put me up in a lovely Inn in Luxembourg. I can't even begin to express what went through me. You can likely imagine. It was exactly as I pictured it. It was short and sweet and I will never forget what I experienced. But, New York beckoned, along with another 20 years of important journey, in the wild collage of life yet to unfold. I didn't daydream intentionally. I didn't map anything. I didn't ask God to take me there and visualize the mode of transport. I just dreamt being there, over and over, in my mind, many times throughout my life. Nothing was manipulated or pumped with some other manifesting energy. I didn't journal, I didn't do affirmations, or consciously meditate or anything like that. I simply had something gorgeously alive and activated in my soul. Clearly, something that has been resting peacefully here all this time. On some level, I must have believed I was loved. What does it all mean? I do not know. But let's try this on for size, while we are thinking about it. Let's stop trying so hard. It's already programmed. Stop interfering my love. Just allow your wonderful and amazing life to unfold gracefully and have no worries. Spend your days in love with yourself, and others. Everything you desire is on the way- when the time is right. In the meantime, just enjoy creating a bountiful life in the present moment, without the need for a concrete slab. It's all in the process. Vibe with your soul urge without sweating it, and allow the Divine Light of Love to carry you on Wings of Faith. Walk in Love and Service, don't interfere with your own desires, and realize your Grandest Vision automatically. It's in the bag. I have no doubt that the day will come when I will be writing to you from a laptop on the highest hills of Austria. You can bet I'll have the webcam and the Heidi dress. OMG, this is so fun. In light, Sheree Rainbolt-Kren RM slivermoon22@aol.com
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