Why do We Celebrate Birthdays
By Sam Vaknin
Author of "Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited"

Why do we celebrate birthdays? What is it that we are toasting? Is
it the fact that we have survived another year against many odds?
Are we marking the progress we have made, our cumulative
achievements and possessions? Is a birthday the expression of hope
sprung eternal to live another year?

None of the above, it would seem.

If it is the past year that we are commemorating, would we still
drink to it if we were to receive some bad news about our health and
imminent demise? Not likely. But why? What is the relevance of
information about the future (our own looming death) when one is
celebrating the past? The past is immutable. No future event can
vitiate the fact that we have made it through another 12 months of
struggle. Then why not celebrate this fact?

Because it is not the past that is foremost on our minds. Our
birthdays are about the future, not about the past. We are
celebrating having arrived so far because such successful resilience
allows us to continue forward. We proclaim our potential to further
enjoy the gifts of life. Birthdays are expressions of unbridled,
blind faith in our own suspended mortality.

But, if this were true, surely as we grow older we have less and
less cause to celebrate. What reason do octogenarians have to drink
to another year if that gift is far from guaranteed? Life offers
diminishing returns: the longer you are invested, the less likely
you are to reap the dividenda of survival. Indeed, based on actuary
tables, it becomes increasingly less rational to celebrate one's
future the older one gets.

Thus, we are forced into the conclusion that birthdays are about
self-delusionally defying death. Birthdays are about preserving the
illusion of immortality. Birthdays are forms of acting out our
magical thinking. By celebrating our existence, we bestow on
ourselves protective charms against the meaninglessness and
arbitrariness of a cold, impersonal, and often hostile universe.

And, more often than not, it works. Happy birthday!


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AUTHOR BIO (must be included with the article)



Sam Vaknin ( http://samvak.tripod.com ) is the author of Malignant
Self Love - Narcissism Revisited and After the Rain - How the West
Lost the East. He served as a columnist for Global Politician,
Central Europe Review, PopMatters, Bellaonline, and eBookWeb, a
United Press International (UPI) Senior Business Correspondent, and
the editor of mental health and Central East Europe categories in
The Open Directory and Suite101.

Until recently, he served as the Economic Advisor to the Government
of Macedonia.

Visit Sam's Web site at http://samvak.tripod.com