The Top Ten Reasons I Hate Wine - Two, The Embarassing Lack Of Knowledge
Word Count: 418
Author: Levi Reiss

I know that it may seem a bit paradoxical. I have written
many articles and reviews praising (and when required
panning) French, German, and Italian wine and the food to
accompany them. I am happy when I find a successful wine
and food pairing, especially when it is unconventional. I
have also written many travel articles that always manage
to discuss local wine and food. It's true; I really do love
wine and food. But I also hate wine and many aspects of the
wine scene. Let me explain my top ten reasons for this
love-hate relationship.

The unconscionable expense was already discussed in article
one of this series. Reason number two is the embarrassing
lack of knowledge: Not long ago one member enlivened our
wine-tasting group by asking us to identify a white wine in
a blind tasting. First, I guessed that it was a Viognier.
Wrong. Then I proposed Gewuertztraminer. Wrong again. I can
name white wine varieties until the cows come home,
especially if I get a late start, but unfortunately that
wasn't the objective. One member correctly identified the
variety on her first shot; it was a South American
Torrontes. That might have been my thirty-seventh guess.
Let me salvage my pride by informing all and sundry that I
have definitely heard of Torrontes grapes and even tasted
Torrontes wine. (Maybe I would be better off by pretending
that I never previously tasted this grape.) I even know
that it comes from South America. And, just to keep the
record straight, she didn't tell us and probably couldn't
tell us if the grapes came from the south side of the
field. But then again neither could I.

Once upon a time a prospective wine expert would learn a
series of rules, such as white wine goes with fish, fine
French wines are X...while fine California wines are Y...
and that was that. Actually, like most nostalgia, the
international wine situation was never quite so simple. But
keeping up with today's wine world is markedly more
complicated, even in comparison with the previous decade.
Dozens of countries have the gall to produce excellent
wines in a multitude of styles. Sometimes I just wish they
would stop innovating and give me a few decades to catch up.

Here are the other reasons: No wine cellar I can't get the
... bottle opened The insomnia Food problems Wine snobs
Those smells and those tastes Those colors Home brew One
more problem and yes The Solution


About the Author:

Levi Reiss has authored or co-authored ten books on
computers and the Internet, but he prefers drinking fine
Italian or other wine, accompanied by the right foods and
people. He knows about dieting but now eats and drinks what
he wants, in moderation. He teaches classes in computers at
an Ontario French-language community college. His new wine,
diet, health, and nutrition website
http://www.wineinyourdiet.com links to his other sites.