When Good People Go Bonkers
Mark Meshulam

We all go nuts sometimes. Even someone as sublimely well balanced as myself
goes off the deep end once in a while.

When this happens, the bizarre behavior of the suddenly wacko can bring
damage to themselves, their business relationships, and yes, even their
furniture.

Why do we go bananas? Sometimes we allow frustrations to accumulate without
releases such as "talking it through", physical activity or masturbation
until we boil over.

Sometimes a situation pushes a button in our psyche which releases a gusher
of emotion stored from long-ago pain. This eruption can come seemingly from
nowhere and usually scares the piss out of everyone in range including the
eruptor himself.

At Evanston(IL) Hospital Outpatient Psychiatry, where I spent a six month
internship bringing better mental health to scores of afflicted
suburbanites, it was openly discussed that more people would flip out during
the full moon. I believe the term they used was "we have more patients in
crisis". Is this human response to the 28 day lunar cycle the etymology of
"looney"?

Perhaps not so coincidently, another 28 day cycle which can bring occasional
bouts of wackiness is the so-called female cycle, which is not to be
confused with a Vespa motor scooter. This caused some UFO theorists to opine
that women might actually be aliens not from Venus as originally believed,
but rather from the Moon, come to disrupt the football games and bank
accounts of men.

Some say that men have a similar cycle - not to be confused with a Harley
Davidson - but men are either too complex, or more likely far too simple and
random for a true pattern to emerge.

Whatever the reason, when someone you know goes apeshit, do the following:

1. Get the hell away. People in the throes of a psychotic episode can have
superhuman strength. They experience something similar to the legendary
adrenalin rush which allows animal activists to lift cars off pinned-down
pussy cats, a frequent sight in my neighborhood. Nutcases in full bloom can
easily turn your head all the way around - remember Linda Blair in The
Exorcist? - by grasping it lightly between thumb and forefinger.

2. Stay the hell away. When a person goes beserk, it can last a few days.
During that time he will be manically obsessing about whatever insult or
injury they perceived to have happened. He is not negotiable yet; don't even
try unless your idea of fun is bashing your head repeatedly into masonry.

3. Watch (from under the desk if necessary) for the real person to return.
After such an intense outpouring, Dr. Jekyll will crash from exhaustion.
When he emerges, he might be in the sheepish, "What happened?" mode. That is
the time for love and support. Try saying, "Wow, you really went through
something there, didn't you?" If he says something normal, like "yes", you
are making progress. If he snarls or throws his mouse at you, revert to #2
above.

4. Have some sympathy. Remember, you have gone daffy yourself. Remember what
it was like. It came from pain, didn't it? That's what happened to your
psycho, he had a tsunami of pain. Remembering this will help you be
sympathetic. You might need this help if el loco stabbed you in the eye
yesterday with a letter opener.

5. Let him talk and offer only gentle guidance. If a person talks enough, he
will eventually realize that they got "out of line", but he will need some
space in order to realize this. If you offer this insight yourself,
especially too early, you might get your hand stapled to your ear.

6. Listening is key. Here's how you do it: Look into the person's eyes with
a slightly sad frown. Nod slowly and knowingly after they say each sentence.
Resist the urge to offer your wonderful opinion - this part is called
"shutting up". Wait until he stops talking. Count to 10. Then say one
carefully chosen sentence which is either insightful or encouraging. Repeat
until cool.

7. To take lunatic handling to the state of the art, try to get him to
analyze the triggering event and why it was so extroardinarily evocative.

8. To really bring it on home, get your nutcase to commit to monitoring his
reactions, so that if another triggering event occurs in the future, he will
be ready with a better, more adaptive behavior. This might include removing
himself from the situation with a planned excuse like, "Pardon me but I must
leave this meeting unexpectedly because my dry cleaning is ready."

Mark Meshulam designs productivity software, owns a construction company and
holds a masters degree
in Group Dynamics. Articles draw upon 27 years in business. Topics revolve
around people and technology
at work. Blog: www.poingology.com Try his software for free at
http://www.poingo.com