Your Wise Friendships   

"If we choose to focus our awareness and energy on those things and
people that bring us pleasure and satisfaction, we have a very good
chance of being happy in a world full of unhappiness."  -Dr.
Livingston

I consider wise friendships to be those that support and accept your
authentic self.  These are the friends who you really feel
comfortable being yourself around.  They are the ones who you
know "got your back", even when your back isn't around.  You have a
mutual trust.  Your experiences with friends can really lift you
higher….or they can drain and exhaust you.   Do yourself a favor.
Spend more time with the former and less with the latter.  Read on
for some tips:

•       Increase time with women who really lift you up.  If your
friendship is really based on mutual fondness and respect for each
other, you generally feel better in some way after spending time
with that person.  Perhaps you feel exuberant because you shared
some great ideas with each other.  Maybe she was able to support
your latest passion you've brought into your life.  Or perhaps she
just listened well on a topic you needed to share.  Whatever the
situation, you feel you are better in some way.  Keep this person in
your life.  And be sure you give back to her as well.
•       Decrease time with those who bring you down or wear you
down.  If you find yourself in a friendship that continually brings
you lower, consider spending less time with this person.  If you
consistently feel more anxious, more depressed or more drained after
sharing time with someone, this is not a meaningful friendship for
you.  (And it's probably not for her either).  Don't sweat it.  But
do remember that your time and energy is valuable.  By minimizing
your time with friendships that aren't supportive, you free yourself
up for more enriching people and experiences.
•       Participate in groups that appeal to you.  Don't waste your
time in groups that you don't enjoy or feel comfortable in.
Sometimes groups that are designed for a certain populations, such
as "all new mothers" or "women who work", just don't have enough
people in them who genuinely interest you.  That's okay.  But don't
go!  It's far better to spend your energy searching for, or even
creating, social or interest groups that you find stimulating.
•       Trust your instincts.  It's amazing how much time we'll put
into analyzing why a particular group or friendship doesn't seem
good for us.  Save your energy!  Trust your gut with people and your
life will become more rewarding.  It's that simple.

Your life is short.  As a busy mom, and a dynamic individual, you
have a limited amount of social time.  Spend it wisely.




Bria Simpson, MA
Life Coach and Parenting Specialist


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© 2005 by Bria Simpson
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Email: mailto:bria@briacoach.com
Web: http://www.briacoach.com
Helping moms strengthen and balance their family lives while
rediscovering their own passions and interests.